


So far away is my true home

by purplefox



Series: ShukitaWeek2019 [1]
Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, M/M, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-16
Updated: 2019-04-16
Packaged: 2020-01-15 04:13:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18491110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purplefox/pseuds/purplefox
Summary: Shukita Week Day 1: Distance and ComfortAkira is back in his hometown longing for his boyfriend. Yusuke is back with the others but all Akira can think about is Yusuke. constantly messaging him counting down the moments until they meet again





	So far away is my true home

**Author's Note:**

> Day1 is late because Akirenweek drained me and 10K is a lot...

The nights were long and quiet. Akira had gotten a little too used to Tokyo maybe. Or maybe it was that it was hard to adjust. Hard to sleep alone. Maybe he had gotten a little too used to someone’s breathing other than his own. Someone other than Morgana.

“You’re sulking again.” Morgana muttered from where he was curled up on Akira’s pillow. There were four other pillows on the bed but Morgana somehow always ended up curling up on his. “There’s not that much time left until vacation you know.”

“I know.” Akira admitted as he moved to his window. Outside was dark and quiet. No traffic, no drunks. If he were to carefully listen there would be no laughter or shattering glass. No smells of a bathhouse either. Or the smells of frying food. There was just crisp cold air and nothing else. “Doesn’t make sleep come any faster Mona.”

“You sap.” Morgana muttered. “And you usually put on such a brave face too.”

“Well.” Akira smiled. “What exactly am I supposed to do? I can’t leave.” His parents would lose it if he ran off. Even if it was just to Tokyo. He had responsibilities too. Also, there were no trains or buses running this late. He had to stick where he was and wait. There was no way that he could make it to Tokyo and to the person he wanted to be with in a few minutes or even hours.

“So you’re going to look outside and sulk.” Morgana muttered. “You should put that energy to good use and work out a bit. Your stretches were looking a bit pathetic you know Joker.”

Morgana was baiting him. Trying to distract him. Akira knew that. He gave a small laugh before he closed his window. “Really?” He laughed. “I guess to a cat like you everything a human does is sort of pathetic huh.” He shook his head. “But I was really trying you know. The metaverse and the real world is something completely different.”

“Tell me about it.” Morgana muttered. “I have no idea why you would do a sport like that. It’s kind of pointless isn’t it?”

“But don’t I look cool?” Akira teased as he sat on his bed. He gently stroked Morgana’s back until his hand got softly lashed with Morgana’s tail. Morgana’s fur was cool and soft. It reminded him of something else that was usually cool and soft that he used to stroke in his bed because it was silky. He was a bit lonesome. “I think I look cool.” Akira said softly. “And it’s fun too.”

“You make it look like it is fun.” Morgana snorted as he rolled over. Akira watched the way he uncurled before he rolled around and snuggled in on Akira’s pillow again. “It still looks crazy.”

“Well I can’t say sane people do this.” Akira laughed. “But there is beauty in all of it. So you have to be a bit more understanding Mona. Maybe if you had tried it in your other body you would understand.”

“Ugh.” Morgana shuddered. “I want vacation to come so that you don’t keep saying creepy things like that.” He opened one eye and glared at Akira. “If you are just going to stare about and mumble nonsense. You might as well turn off the light and lie down.”

“You’re right.” Akira laughed. “You know, you are actually right there.” He sighed. “Maybe somehow I’ll be able to go to sleep.” He doubted it. His bed was too cold. Too lonely. Even with Morgana there. But vacation was coming so that would be fixed soon.

X

“It’s quiet.” Akira laughed softly. “So weird.” Morgana’s snore was the only thing that responded to him. Akira snickered to himself as he accepted the soft snores from Morgana. “Guess I’m not used to it yet.” Akira said softly. “Being back, it’s so strange. Everything is so odd.” Another snore from Morgana was the only answer he received.

He really was not used to it yet. The quiet of his neighbourhood. So many things he was still getting accustomed to and wasn’t that funny and a little heart-breaking in itself? In one year he had gotten used to so many things and thought them as the norm. this was where he came from yet Akira was not used to any of it at all. It all felt so foreign.

It all felt so odd and he knew his parents would be heart broken if Akira was ever to put words to his feelings. If he were to bring up how he could not sleep because it was too quiet. How eerier it was for his room to be pitch black at night. No lights from outside. No noise, no driving no sounds of laughter. No glasses breaking or drunk talking. No smells from the bathhouse. No faint alcohol smells, no smells of food cooking.

In just one year his life at Yongen-Jaya had become the norm for him. There was no way for Akira to bring it up to his parents that he was home after a year but still getting accustomed to home. No way without making them upset or making big waves.

After everything his parents had gone through because of the situation, Akira was reluctant to tell them. How could he even tell them anyway? What would he tell them? There were so many parts he had to keep a secret for his sanity’s sake and for the sake of being normal.

His parents, he loved them and they had gone through a lot because of Shido. After a year they just wanted to put everything behind them. Akira could not blame them it was why he had been so determined to keep his head down for the year after all.

Not that it had worked. From the moment that Akira had started to attend school there had been no chance for normal or even keeping his head down. He guessed that had to be his destiny. He was just glad that everything he had done had never come back to reach here and his parents.

A year was a long time for things to change. A year was apparently enough time for Akira to become the sort of person that could not sleep in his childhood bedroom anymore. It just felt too big, it was too quiet and too spacious.

Morgana’s snores were a bit of background sound but beyond that there was absolutely nothing. Just quiet and Akira kept straining his ears for something to cling to. Maybe if his house was one of the older ones there would be something to hear like the sound of an old house creaking.

But for Akira all he had to cling to was Morgana’s soft snores in his room. It was a bit lonesome. The bed was too soft, the surroundings were so quiet that Akira felt as though he was drowning in the silence. It was so sharp that he could not fall asleep and the bed felt too huge.

He had really gotten used to LeBlanc and his struggles there after all. Maybe his parents would cry if he ever talked about how much of a home that place felt. Not that this was not home. This was where he grew up. He could see his own influence around the room but that was not it at all.

Akira had changed so much while he was gone, a year was a short amount of time and a long stretch of time at the same time. For most people, coming back after a year would be like coming home. Being in his room should be like a breath of fresh air and contain a familiar feel. For Akira it had been like coming to a room he felt he no longer fit in.

He had truly been gone in more ways than one. He knew how his parents felt. After suffering a year of whispers and pointed gazes they had a small break with him gone. With him no longer the target of gossip others could learn to forget. Now he was back and the record wiped clean. There were even whispers of his involvement with helping the police.

It was an up and up for his parents. They could put the whole mess behind themselves and move on with their lives as a family. They could move around neighbours as before. Akira could pick off where he left off without having to feel anything. That was what his parents were going for.

So for Akira to not be used to things here. For Akira to be still settling in. For Akira who was not ready to pick off where he started. The way he felt he knew there was no picking up where he had started. Times had changed, he was no longer the kid that had lived here. No longer the kid with a straight path towards his dreams.

That night had changed him and had sent him to Tokyo. Where he had gone to Shujin and met Ryuji. Where he had ended in a situation with Ann, Ryuji and Morgana. Where he had learned what he wanted to do. Where he had discovered an exciting part of people. An exciting world. Where he had helped people and punished those who thought they were untouchable.

He had changed a lot in Tokyo, he had learned to blend in. as the leader of the phantom thieves he had learned about infiltration and blending it. Every person who he felt he could have learned something from. Akira had made use of. But it had been a two way street always. His confidants, even when he had wanted to keep them away from phantom thieve matters they had found their way in anyways.

And he had learned because of them. He had seen new things because of them. Because of the people he met and talked to. Akira had changed and grew. There was no chance of him clinging to the old him that fit this room perfectly.

He had grown used to the attic. The nights he sat up making infiltration tools. The places he decorated with things his friends had gotten him or he had won himself. working out under Morgana’s watchful eye. Sitting around in his room with one of his friends listening to them or just laying around.

He had gotten used to that uncomfortable bed in LeBlanc for many reasons but mostly because he had not always slept alone. Granted there was Mona but there was another weight that Akira had grown accustomed to. Now that he was back home he found that another reason it was hard to sleep in this big soft bed of his was because Yusuke was not here.

He missed him terribly. Granted he was not alone because of Morgana but Mona’s weight was not enough. And even his snores were not enough to make up for the warmth and comfort that Akira had grown accustomed to. He had been so used to Yusuke’s warmth. To the feeling of Yusuke curled against or on him as they slept under the covers. Akira had grown so used to it that it felt strange to be in this soft bed.

Yusuke was not here. That was one of the biggest reasons that Akira was not used to his childhood bedroom. This place was not filled with Yusuke the way LeBlanc’s attic had been. The stars that they had stuck on together. they had glowed a soft green at night. Many nights he would sleepily watch the ceiling as Yusuke’s soft breaths lulled him to sleep.

Yusuke’s warmth against him had been a pleasure to fall asleep to and to wake to. Akira’s big lonely soft bed just felt foreign. He had spent a few months used to sleeping squeezed against Yusuke with Morgana sleeping on them on top of the cover. Or curled over their heads. So he was supposed to be used to this how? He missed his boyfriend. That was the biggest reason Akira could not sleep at night. It was quiet, he was used to more noise and activity.

He was used to not being alone. Morgana counted as somebody but it was not the same. And his bed was so big that it barely mattered anyway. Morgana’s soft snores filled the room a bit but it was just a part of what Akira had grown used to.

He had grown used to late night whispers. Late night soft kisses, Morgana telling him off or Yusuke off for being up late at night. Falling asleep in Yusuke’s arms or Yusuke nodding off first in his. After months of this, it was really hard to come back to this quiet emptiness. In fact, Akira had put out of his mind that he was coming back to this sort of things at all.

X

His phone buzzed three times before his alarm was supposed to go off. Akira heard it immediately. The sun had not risen yet, his room was fairly dark. Morgana was still sleeping away. His snores were quieter now but in the quiet room they were still a bit noisy.

Akira had managed to drop off to sleep at some time. He had spent time staring up at his ceiling missing the stars of LeBlanc. Spent time thinking and recalling his favourite times with Yusuke. Maybe he had dropped off to sleep thinking about the times they had just sat close to each other not saying a word and appreciating the closeness of each other’s bodies.

Maybe that was it indeed. Akira really had no other explanation when it came to it. He had managed to fall asleep when he had been ready to swear that he was going to suffer a sleepless night. But he had managed to drop off and now he was wide awake.

Back to his phone, his alarm had not gone off yet. The way that the room felt and his window looked, Akira was willing to bet that he had at least forty five minutes before he was supposed to wake up and do his morning routine.

But his phone had just buzzed so someone was up. It was that or his service provider had seriously gone crossing lines and getting his hopes up. Akira slipped his hand from under his heavy comforter in search of his phone. Everything was plugged close to the wall on his side left side since his bed was pressed right up against it.

His hand slid over his phone before he managed to grab it and click it to unlock it. Akira waited for the brightness to dim a bit before he chanced looking at his screen. That was always the first thing he did when he picked up his phone. Lower the brightness before he was blinded.

Morgana’s snores were still going on so he chuckled low in his chest as he turned slowly on his side and brought his phone up to his face. Three messages and none from his service provider. Akira felt his heart flip in his chest when he saw whose icon had the three little notifications.

 ** _“Good Morning, as early as it is I can find myself unable to sleep any longer.”_** Began the first message. **_“Perhaps you are the same? It is rather difficult to sleep in when I’m in the dorms.”_**

Akira could agree with that. In more ways than one, about it being hard to sleep in period. Everything felt so odd that he could not relax in his bed at all. It was hard to do anything lazy when he did not want to stay in bed and he could not sleep. And Akira had slept over at the dorms. A few interesting times and that had not been comfortable at all. He had enjoyed lying on the futon Yusuke’s hand in his. But the dorms were not somewhere he saw himself being comfortable.

Besides, the dorms were more like Yusuke’s work space. He had to be poring his all into his works. Akira saw that happening. He missed his boyfriend so much it was painful to remember sometimes. He was so far away. No longer a train and a few transfers away. He was so far and Akira wanted to hold him. He wanted to be held.

 ** _“I found myself working late into the night.”_** The second message began. **_“And then I fell asleep in the middle of unfolding my futon. I know you would scold me as well as find it amusing. I do find it a bit amusing. I awoke with sore knees and no desire to sleep any longer. However while I want to paint I want to hear you. See you, touch you far more than I want to lift my brush.”_**

Akira’s breath hitched and he had to close his eyes for a few minutes. He felt that, he seriously did. He missed Yusuke. Yusuke was right about his amusement. Akira had seen Yusuke nod off more than a few times to be able to picture the scene and what must have happened. It was funny but he wanted Yusuke to take care of himself. Even while it was hard to fall asleep.

“I find myself counting the days until I can leave. I picked the fastest and earliest train they have and yet it still does not feel early enough.” The final message read. “Every day I remind myself that you are still in reach and that soon I’ll see you face to face. My skin feels lonely and while I’ve never minded the cold. I find myself missing your warmth. Morgana’s way of talking has recently been on my thoughts as well. Maybe it is the earliness of the morning.”

Akira smiled as he finished reading. Somehow, always he and Yusuke. They managed to connect so strongly that it was on another level. This was the person that he loved. He fully understood Akira and everything that Akira had been thinking about. Yusuke had said. He loved him so much. He wanted to see him, He wanted to touch him. He wished there was a way for them to touch now but Akira had to take what he had and count the days.

X

“Why are you up already? Is the alarm going to go off later?” Morgana yawned as he stretched on the bed. “Or did it go off already?” He rolled over and shook himself before he stretched. “Or did it not go off and you got up on your own?” He questioned as he sat down. “Or did you just not sleep properly again.”

Akira’s phone chirped at that moment his alarm finally going off. He flicked it off and resumed his sit ups. “The last one and you just heard the alarm.” He said slowly as he continued his sit ups. His routine was something he did everyday no matter what.

Even when he had been arrested again. He had continued. It had been changed up a bit obviously. There were not that many places he could do pull ups. Akira’s Dad had offered to put a bar in his room so Akira had that to look forward to. For now, he did a bit of everything that he could and tried to keep limber and fit.

“Goodness.” Morgana groaned before he gently leapt to the ground. “You know, if you had a crappy time sleeping like you say you did. Why do you look so happy?” Akira watched Morgana approach as he continued his work out. “Wait, I bet I know.” Morgana scoffed as Akira continued in silence. “I bet a can of tuna and your mom’s fried marlin that Yusuke couldn’t sleep either and he messaged you. Or you messaged him.”

“What’s wrong with my boyfriend sending me a nice message?” Akira questioned with a smile. Morgana scoffed as Akira reached a hundred and fifty and sighed. He stayed where he was. Sitting up as he felt the sharpness in his gut that was telling him many things. “You got up in time though Mona. I want to try for at least twenty pullups on the beams before I head down and make coffee.”

“You’re a case you know that?” Morgana groaned before he glanced up at the ceiling. “There isn’t even a good grip there. You can wait until your Dad installs the thing.”

“I could.” Akira agreed as he got to his feet and stretched. He stretched and stretched as he eyed the beam. “But I don’t like wasting time. We’ve tested it and once I don’t push it too far. The roof will be fine for now. It’s just for another week and I’ll have the pullup bar.”

“Ugh.” Morgana grumbled as he glanced at Akira’s desk. “Fine, I’ll spot you but only do ten. If I hear anything suspicious we are going to start coffee you hear? Or actually, you should take a bath and then start the coffee.”

“Going to come in the bath with me Morgana?” Akira teased.

“You wish.” Morgana scoffed as he swished his tail. “I give myself great baths already as you must know.”

“Uh huh.” Akira snorted. “Mom doesn’t allow unbathed cats in the house so you better get used to having a cat bath again soon. You should come along, then you would get used to it.”

X

Just the way Sojiro taught him. Akira was switching between drying his hair and attending to the coffee. The best change to his house that he had come back to find was the coffee siphon. It showed that his parents were listening to him and that they did pay attention to what was going on with him in his life.

They wanted him to use the skills that he had gotten when away. And it was rather nice to make coffee for everyone. His father certainly enjoyed it. He used to have only a cup before work and that was usually rushed. Now he got up earlier so he could slowly enjoy two before work.

Akira’s mother loved coffee. Not for the reasons others usually did, that it kept them up or woke them up. She loved the taste. Akira had found right away that making coffee for his mother was a pleasure, she would smile laugh and drink until she found that she was running late.

She would congratulate him, take pictures and kiss him on the head like she used to do when he was in elementary school. She would laugh and she would smile when she caught him by the siphon or even pouring the coffee into mugs.

It had been a long year and it had taken a toll on his parents. They had been fighting their own battles remaining here after all. He knew how much they wanted to pick up and move on. He was not the same kid that had left but he loved them and they loved him.

They accepted him as he was and Akira loved them for that. That was not the only thing he was thankful to his parents for. They accepted the people he claimed as friends and more. So how could Akira not pour everything he had into every cup of coffee? It was worth it and it was fun too.

“It always looks as thought it tastes really good.” Morgana complained from where he sat on the cat cushion on the counter. Akira’s mother had put the yellow cushion just for Morgana to sit on and watch Akira _. “Cats like to see what you’re doing. And I heard that one is rather attached to you.”_ She had laughed when she had put it down. _“I really don’t want fur flying all over the place so keep him brushed well and let him stay here and only here okay? Or put a towel down where he wants to hang out.”_

“It’s an acquired taste.” Akira smiled. “It’s bitter but sweet at the same time.”

“When your mom kisses me goodbye it certainly smells so.” Morgana muttered as he settled down. “Man isn’t there like coffee for cats or something? It’s driving me nuts not knowing what I’m missing out on.”

X

Akira’s phone began to ring while he was at the table and he found himself scrambling for it while fighting a blush. His mother snorted into her coffee cup splashing bits of liquid onto the spot in front of her. Akira’s father looked up from where he was feeding Morgana strips of tuna slowly to shake his head.

“And I thought the younger generation was all about having things on vibrate or silent.” His father jokingly teased as he coaxed Morgana to lean up for another strip of tuna. “And such a loud tone too. I hope you don’t let it ring like that in class Akira.”

“I’m certain that Akira only took it off vibrate is so he doesn’t miss an important call.” His mother teased as Akira flushed further. “But the ways phones work, maybe it is that only one call isn’t on vibrate. I bet we are on vibrate.” She muttered against her cup. “I bet he wouldn’t take us off of vibrate.”

“And you would be right.” Akira muttered as he accepted the call and pushed back his chair. Only to wince at the look his mother gave him. He gently lifted the chair and put it back and mouthed a sorry to her until she nodded. “I’ll be right back.” He whispered before he lifted the phone to his ear. “Wait for a second.” He smiled. “I’m not taking food up to my room without a plate.” He promised as he shovelled a forkful of rice into his mouth. He chewed hurriedly before he made a grab for one of the fried fish. Then he slowly moved back his hand at his father’s look. “Okay, I just won’t take long he laughed.

“Tell Yusuke-kun I said good morning.” His mother smiled as she went back to drinking her coffee. “I can’t wait to see his pretty face again.”

“It’s going to be fun to have Yusuke-chan in the house.” His father laughed as he made kissy sounds at Morgana. He kept patting his lap, an obvious invitation for Morgana to leap into it. “I wonder if we can commission him to paint Morgana here. We can hang it at the top of the stairs. Or in the kitchen by the wall where the alarms are.”

“Yusuke-kun might not bring his paints dear.” His mother sighed. “Tell Yusuke-kun bring his paints! Not sketchpads. I’ll get some. Dear don’t you know somewhere that you can get some artist canvases?”

“If I ask Tooya-san I might be able to get a few.” His father mused as Morgana rubbed against his leg until he dropped another strip of fish. “I’ll check after work. We can make the attic or spare bedroom a art studio!”

“And I’ll be back.” Akira rolled his eyes as he left his parents behind. “Morning.” He whispered into his phone.

“Good morning.” Yusuke’s response was immediate. Akira had to close his eyes as he heard his voice. So crisp and clear he wished he was right there. That he could see his face. “Your parents seem as lively as always.”

“That’s them.” Akira laughed.

“Sorry about calling right away.” Yusuke sounded a bit down. “But when you said that you wanted to see me, hear me. I was unable to stop myself.”

“Yusuke.” Akira said softly as he pushed open his bedroom door. “There’s nothing wrong with that.” He admitted. “I’m glad you did.” He whispered. “I wanted to hear you. I’m glad that I’m hearing you.” He sighed as he looked around his room. “I wish I was going to run into you today.”

“I wish that I had a chance of seeing you on my way to school.” Yusuke whispered. “Or even afterwards. But soon Akira. I’ll be there soon. Even though it feels as though it is not soon enough.”

“Soon.” Akira closed his eyes tightly as he smiled. “It’s so good to hear your voice.” He whispered. “It makes me feel lighter. Already I know I can get through the day.”

X

“I feel abandoned.” Morgana remarked as he sat on Akira’s bed. “I never knew how boring it was to stay behind until you started to leave me behind.”

“Well I can’t take you to class everyday.” Akira laughed as he finished dressing. He shrugged into his jacket and eyed himself in the mirror. “A few days a week not every day. Just the days that I know I’ll beat my parents back home. They aren’t fond of you leaving the house.”

“That’s because they think I am a normal cat.” Morgana scoffed. “It would be different if they knew I’m perfectly fine. That I can easily make my way around this neighbourhood and even go to school with you.”

“It would be a different story yeah.” Akira admitted. “They might not spoil you as much for one.” He teased as he adjusted the sleeves on himself. he fixed his pants before he nodded to himself at his appearance. It was not Shujin or even Kosei but it was the school uniform he had was wearing before all of this started.

“You really are leaving the glasses behind.” Morgana shook his head as his tail swished slowly. “Cute.”

“It would cause more trouble than they are worth.” Akira shrugged. “Besides, that was for Shujin and keeping my head down. It doesn’t matter here.”

“Yeah…Joker.” Morgana said as he leaned forward. “Would you? Ever tell your parents the real story about the phantom thieves? Not the stuff that Makoto’s sister and the parole officer gave them. The true story? Would you tell them?”

“Could I?” Akira wondered aloud. His gaze moved to his desk and the three photos on it. Group photo of the phantom thieves after they had driven him home. The picture he and Yusuke had taken before he had gone back. The last picture was of a younger him, an athletic meet with Akira and his trophies. His happy parents. So proud and loving, so secure in their happiness. “It’s already over.” Akira said softly. “The people who need to know everything already know everything.”

X

 ** _“Miss you.”_** Akira typed as he walked. There was a few seconds where he had to wait for the message to go through before he was able to smile because it had been received. Then he laughed when it was immediately read.

 ** _“I miss you as well.”_** Yusuke’s immediate reply made him laugh as he walked to the school. He had turned down his father’s offer of a ride. And he had laughed when his mother had driven by his side until he made it to the bus stop. Akira had stuck his tongue out at her and she had thrown a napkin at his audacity only to swear and tell him to pick it up and throw it away. Which he had done while laughing.

There was nothing wrong with going to school on his own. He had let his parents coddle him only for a week. They were trying to move on with their lives after all. And before the Shido incident Akira had been expected to fend for himself. With occasional rides of mercy, like in heavy rain or when the buses were really delayed.

So he had wanted to ease back into the rhythm and blend into the school as much as he could. The teachers had already heard the whispers. The coach had taken up staring at him when Akira passed him in the halls. He never let his eyes linger. Not with any of them.

Beyond classwork he never looked for friends. It was hard to care about the simple town life and concerns when he was still reeling for the year he had gone through. When he was still longing for Shujin, Yongen-Jaya and his boyfriend.

“Hearing you today was so nice.” Akira typed as he looked between his screen and the road ahead of him. The last that he wanted was to end up tripping in the middle of the road. That would not be fun at all. “Makes me feel like you’re closer already. Hearing your voice lets me know I’ll really get through this and that we will see each other again. Really soon.”

Akira actually had to wait a few seconds for Yusuke’s reply even after he saw it had been read. He considered the fact that Yusuke most likely was travelling just like him when his phone vibrated. “Hearing your voice does make it seem as though you are closer. For me, it lets me know while you are not right by my side. You still are close enough. My voice can reach you and yours can reach me. It gives me hope that in time the distance between us will shorten.”

Yusuke just was not fair. Akira closed his eyes tightly as he gave a slow breath out and then sucked in a deep breath. He wanted to hold Yusuke right away. He wanted to touch his hand. Touch his face. He wanted to hold him tightly and he knew it was soon but it was not soon enough.

“Sometimes.” Akira typed slowly. “I find myself wanting to hear your voice. You could be saying anything at all. I sometimes just want to hear it in my ear.”

“I believe your phone as well as my phone.” Yusuke responded. “Has a record and voice note function in the messages. We should make use of these more often because I as well find myself longing to hear your voice. You could be saying anything at all but I ache to hear your voice all the same. Especially times I know that calling you would not exactly be wise.”

“I know your schedule like the back of my hand.” Akira confessed as he typed. “Better than I know mine actually. When I know you have breaks or that you should be changing or going from class to class. I feel like sneaking out of my class and calling you. Just to hear you answer. I don’t do it obviously.” Akira shook his head as he typed. “But the temptation is there Yusuke. That’s how badly I want to hear you. Every time we talk it is so good but there is never enough time.”

“I don’t think there ever will be enough time. The longer we are apart. The more we long to be by each other’s sides.” Yusuke’s reply read. “Even the day that there is no longer a need for distance between us. We will still dread having to separate. Hopefully maturity would make us a little wiser about these matters. Make us a little less selfish. I want to have you all to myself even when I know the others miss you as well.”

“I want you by my side too. I always have.” Akira eyed the school wall as it came into view. Tall with gleaming silver gates at the top. The gates on top of the wall was supposed to discourage delinquents. Akira had never seen it work. “Hearing your voice more often would take a bit of the ache away but there are somethings we can only talk about when we see each other.” He paused before he wrote again. “Which is why I’m looking forward to having you here. Just you and me, I have a lot to tell you and I’m sure you are the same.”

“It eases the ache but you are right. It is not enough.” Yusuke replied. “But I’m glad we have this much. That we live in this time Akira.”

“I love you.” Akira wrote slowly. “I miss you.”

“I miss you and I love you to a degree that art can never capture.” Akira sent a few emojis to that response before he slid his phone into his pocket. He had arrived at the school gate. The teachers were already waiting watching the others arrive. There was still some time until the gate had to close but one would have never thought so the way the second-year math teacher and the athletics coach was eyeing the passing students.

Akira winced when his former coach tried to catch his eye as he passed along. There were no hard feelings. Maybe a few for not even listening to him. Maybe more than a few there, Akira had been kicked off the team. He loved Pole Vaulting but he was not going to come crawling back after he had been thrown away like that. He would rather wait until he got into college and look there.

It was the same for the gymnastics team. Akira just wanted to live out his last year quietly here. No drama and certainly no friends and that meant that he was not here for any of those that had pushed him away because of the rumours. They had not even asked him anything.

He was not going to come back to the team. He was going to keep in shape because he loved it and it was fun. He had enjoyed running around in the metaverse with everyone. If there was no one to share his joy with. Why even try at it? To make them happy? To get the school medals? From what Akira had seen as the leader of the phantom thieves. That was a path that led towards frustration, disappointment and bitterness. He was trying to go towards a path full of light here.

X

The field looked the same way it always did. Akira sighed as he looked down on the field. He wanted to go home. He wished Ryuji was nearby. He wanted to be anywhere at school. Especially now that his afternoon class had been cancelled. His last class of the day and he still could not go home. That was unnecessarily unfair.

Those enjoying the field looked as though most of them did not even want to be there. Akira couldn’t blame them even though he himself liked to work out. There was something about school that changed the mindset to  ‘go home’ always.

Besides with the free time he had he wanted to go home or study. If he was going to be stuck here he was not going to talk with his classmates. He was going to sit somewhere and find something interesting to show or tell his boyfriend.

Because Akira missed his voice, he missed his touch and presence. Knowing he was a message away was somewhat soothing but until he could press his hand against skin. Akira knew he was not going to be soothed.

He leaned off the railing when he realized the coach had caught sight of him. Akira turned away right away. He was not trying to get involved with any troublesome things. Kicked off the team meant just that. No matter the whispers now was that he had been some sort of hero. They had kicked him out without question. He was not going to walk back by himself.

X

“Soon.” Akira whispered into the phone. “Soon you’re going to be here Yusuke.” He was looking outside his window but it was so dark out that he was not really getting to see anything. Still he was fine. It was what he was hearing that was important here. “I wish I could meet you at the station…” He muttered. “Hey I could skip this meeting they have me in and tag along with my Mom.”

“It would be strange if the subject of the meeting was missing wouldn’t it?” Yusuke’s low laugh made Akira laugh in return. “I want to see you sooner but since Kosei has gone on break first I want to take advantage of that.” His voice lowered and the sheer emotion made Akira blink back tears. “A few hours waiting for you to return is nothing Akira. we’ve put up with this much.”

“I miss you so much.” Akira whispered. “There’s so much I want to do. So many things I want to show you. Things I want to tell you. It was too hurried.” Akira whispered. “We barely got time together before you had to go back. It wasn’t fair.”

“No it was not.” Yusuke admitted. “That’s why we’re being selfish and having this time to ourselves.” He laughed softly. “I want to hug you.”

“Me too.” Akira whispered as he tightened his grip around his phone. “I want to hug you tightly. I want to make you coffee in my kitchen. It’s ridiculous.” He laughed. “I want you to sleep in my bed. It’s way better than the one at LeBlanc.”

“Is that so.” Yusuke laughed. “I suppose I’ll be seeing how much better it is.”

“Yes you will.” Akira smiled. “Soon but not soon enough. I forgot how big my bed is. How my room was. How soft it is.” He said softly. “It’s not fun without you here. It’s just big and lonely. It’s hard to sleep. I got used to you sleeping next to me.”

“I would have to say the same. I miss waking up and looking over your very artistic rendition of a bird’s nest.” Yusuke teased. “I miss falling asleep hearing your heartbeat.”

“I miss falling asleep to yours.” Akira whispered. “Waiting is such hell. Don’t be late.”

“Don’t linger in that meeting.” Yusuke instructed. “Don’t give them any trouble. Don’t be Joker. Those are seconds wasted. People can’t handle cocky Joker.”

“What are you trying to say?” Akira smiled. “You handle Joker just fine. You handled Joker fine from the beginning.”

“And I ended up with my heart stolen.” Yusuke laughed softly. “But that’s not a bad thing.”

“I love you.” Akira said softly as he looked outside into the dark night. “You know, I sort of wish Tokyo wasn’t so bright and annoying. I’d love to trace out a constellation for you right now.”

“And sometimes the trickster turns to a scholar.” Yusuke said softly. “You can still do that but first go sit on your bed. We can talk and you can teach until we fall asleep.”

“It sounds like a plan.” Akira smiled as he moved to his bed. He left the window opened and slipped under his covers. “How about we talk about a delicate connection of stars that-“

X

Akira did not want to be in this room and he did not like the set up either. He did not want to hear anymore. He would rather be home waiting on Yusuke. He would rather be waiting for Yusuke at the train station. That he had to be here. That he had to look all these teachers in the face like this.

He had suspected what this was about. Just a bit but that was honestly more than enough. The subject of his return. Most of the information was distorted and hushed by the fact that he had left in disgrace and come back redeemed. That was main news. It was just the details that was missing.

He was so pissed at it all. These people were keeping him from Yusuke with this nonsense. He did not want to think about this. That was why he had been avoiding looking any of these teachers in the eye. They had thrown him away why should he-

“Do you understand?” Akira knew him, the soft-spoken lab assistant. That he had come to this too was a bit laughable. But the thing that irked him was that he could not storm out he could not raise his voice.

Because in order to proceed they all did have a point. Akira had loved what he had done back then. A year could not change that. He had loved to jump had loved to fly. He had been bitter after being thrown away. The path that he had seen for himself. Akira had thought that it was forever lost. Gone for good. That he would never find anything that made him live like those activities had.

But that was not true. He had met Ryuji, learned his story. They had met Ann and Morgana, the phantom thieves had been found. Akira had learned to be proud of the skills he had.

As much as he would have enjoyed throwing their words back in their faces. As much as he would have loved storming out on them for thinking it could be that easy.

Akira needed them just as much as they needed him. Academics were one thing but sports was another. He wanted to look as good as possible. His applications had to be the best and he needed them for that. His parents would love if he could pick things up as it he had never left. He knew this.

And for that reason and that reason alone he did not storm out after he had entered and seen all the teachers, the principal and the coaches. That and the fact that he missed Yusuke so much. This was just one year and then he could apply for a college. He could move out of his hometown.

He had no idea which art college Yusuke would get in but he knew it would be the best of the best. Akira could not lose, he had to go forward on this path too. He wanted to be by Yusuke’s side in every way that mattered. Letting these people win a trophy here or there for a year. If it got him closer to Yusuke it could be worth it.

“Last year.” Akira said softly. “I was thrown off the teams.” He watched his homeroom teacher flinch before she glanced at his coach. “I was barred from cram school. No one cared about my story and no one cared about the truth. I was bad and that was it.” He glanced at the vice principal. “No one here knows my story even now. Just like then it doesn’t matter. What matters is the bottom line you’ve set for yourselves.”

“That isn’t fair.” His homeroom teacher said softly. “I didn’t know you then but from what we’ve heard and seen on the news. It wasn’t something that a teacher could interfere in so easily.”

“Would it have killed someone to ask me a question? Believe in me?” Akira sighed as he got off the uncomfortable chair. “No one checked me over that day after I got out. No one cared. They all believed and I know that some might still cling to that belief. I…” It hurt to have to put into words. “You are all adults.” Akira said softly. “You are all teachers but I can’t trust you. Any of you. You didn’t help me. You didn’t believe me and now you want something from me?”

“We should have known better but in an environment like this people go with the flow.” His former gymnastics coach said softly. “Just because we see one thing doesn’t mean that something isn’t going on. You seemed like a perfect student but you were a bit distant. A bit disconnected all the same. I felt the only true you that I ever saw was when you performed.”

“You were too respectful to ever just attack an adult.” Akira heart twanged when his coach stood up. “You might get a bit sassy. You might talk back but never fight back to an adult. But the people around at the time, you had gotten involved in something bad kid. Even you know that. We couldn’t get involved maybe that is our failure as teachers, as human beings. We left you in the cold.”

“Yes you did.” Akira swallowed. “I did the right thing that night and an adult lied to me. Lied on me and then I was thrown out. So should I come back? Should I really? I can’t trust any of you in here.” He shrugged. “I don’t even trust you to get my grades right. Because of you I had to start over from the bottom at Shujin.” He glanced around the room. “And it came back to bite all of you didn’t it?”

“Have you made a decision?” The principal spoke up. “Can you? You broke records.”

“Yes I did.” Akira admitted.

“Don’t you have a goal? Somewhere that you want to go?” Akira thought of Tokyo and Yusuke. “As a third year you have to think of your future.”

“There’s someone I promised to meet.” Akira said softly. “And someone I want to dedicate all of my life to. Someone who believed in me and stayed by my side. Someone I can trust. Someone that makes al of this.” He pointed at the room. “Worth it. If they did not think that the me that flies and the me that flips was so cool. I don’t think you would get me to agree to anything.” Akira smiled slowly. “Don’t expect anything over the top from me. I just want to graduate and move on with my life and leave this place.”

X

It had been a long meeting. He had said yes but Akira had felt drained by the time it was over. He was back on the team. He felt strange about that. Happy because he had missed it. Morgana would get a kick from watching him for certain.

He had missed that part of things. The gymnastics team he had to see how the other club members were before he came back. It would be a good distraction and all but they had been the coldest of all. Akira was not looking for friends but he was not looking for sabotage.

He noted his parents cars when he came home. His parents were nowhere to be seen when he came inside though. He eased off his shoes with a sigh and slowly trudged up the stairs to his room. His thoughts were just full of his long tiring day.

When he opened his door Akira froze. He had forgotten, he had somehow forgotten in the middle of the meetings and talks. The signing of papers had distracted him. He had not even checked his phone once.

When the door had opened. Yusuke had turned around from where he stood in the middle of Akira’s room. His hair, fell into his eyes a bit. It had gotten longer in the time they were apart. Yusuke was there, in his room. Just seeing Yusuke made it so much brighter.

“Yusuke.” He was there. He was right there for Akira to hold. For Akira to see. After the day he had suffered. The people he had listened to. Nothing else could have brightened him up like this. “You’re here.”

“Finally.” Yusuke stepped forward slowly bit by bit until he was chest to chest with Akira. he slid his hand across the white uniform Akira wore. “It suits you.”

“I always knew red was your colour.” Akira teased as he rubbed the red shirt that Yusuke wore. “Yusuke.” He whispered before he threw his arms around his boyfriend. The feeling of his body. The fact that Yusuke hugged him back as tightly. He was just so glad he was here. That Yusuke was finally by his side. He felt so alive in Yusuke’s arms.

“Finally I can touch you, hear your voice.” Yusuke whispered as they sank to their knees to Akira’s floor. Akira buried his face into Yusuke’s shoulder rand fought back tears as his body shook. “It’s been so long.” Yusuke’s voice broke. “It’s been so hard Akira.”

“It’s so quiet here.” Akira admitted as his voice shook. “It’s so different here and you aren’t here. You feel so good. You sound so good.” He admitted as his arms shook. “How the hell am I supposed to give you up again? We said just a year but… it has only been a few what weeks? Months?”

“I missed you everyday.” Yusuke pulled back to look into his face. “I drew you over and over. I stared at our pictures. I revisited our spots. I sat in LeBlanc missing your face and your coffee. But I worked hard because I knew I would see you again.”

“Because as long as both of us strive for it.” Akira whispered. “We will see each other soon. The harder we work the sooner we will be able to meet up again. When we are adults.” He whispered. “They can’t separate us. We just have a bit further to go from there.”

“Exactly.” Yusuke whispered. “That’s it Akira. that is exactly it. Soon, and then we can be together as much as we like.” His hand stroked Akira’s cheek. “You look healthy but you seem stressed.”

“You’re one to talk about healthy.” Akira snorted as he examined Yusuke’s face. “You’ve been eating but you haven’t been sleeping. Have you been working more than usual?”

“When I don’t sleep I work.” Yusuke said softly. “I’m actually ahead of several deadlines I entered more competitions than were wise but somehow I’ve managed to exceed expectations. My loneliness and frustrations have been more of a help than a hinderance.”

“Morgana just tells me not to work out so much and sleep.” Akira laughed. “I think I want to trade a bit.” He closed his eyes before he cupped Yusuke’s face. He titled his chin up and smiled how Yusuke went along with it. “This room felt so wrong for so long.” He whispered. “But now you are here. I actually feel like this is my room. It feels like home now.”

“Because I’m here?” Yusuke said softly. “I had just been looking around after your mother let me in. it’s your old room and I see so much you here. The child that you used to be is everywhere here.”

“I guess. I have a hard time of letting some things go.” Akira admitted. “And I like the things I like to surround me. That’s what was missing. In LeBlanc there were the others. There was you. All sorts of experience. It was just the past in here. I want the future in my room. If you aren’t here in some way it’s just a room.” He said softly. “That’s because you-“ Yusuke’s kiss cut him off but he did not mind. Akira sank into the kiss with gratitude and tears sliding down his cheeks. He would never tell anyone but Yusuke but with Yusuke in his room. It felt as though he had truly come home.

X

“I missed you so much.” Akira admitted with his voice lowered. His parents had apparently dropped Yusuke off and taken Morgana with them on a walk. Privacy he guessed but they were back now so the house was full. Morgana had given into his father and was stretched across his lap snoozing.

His mother was writing in one of her workbooks and sipping the coffee he had made. Akira was making more coffee while he kept his gaze on Yusuke.

“Now you’re here.” He said softly. “I can’t believe it.” There was so much he wanted to say, so much he wanted to show. He had started to show the phantom thieves his favourite places the last time they were here but there had not been enough time to show everything which had been a pity.

“It’s nice to be here.” Yusuke stood next to him and held his hand. “It feels good. I feel relaxed and calm.”

Akira knew exactly how that felt. Phones helped, talking helped but there was something about being able to touch and hold the one you loved. “It’s home.” He whispered. “You make it home Yusuke.”

X

“I haven’t been this eager to go to bed.” Akira laughed as he pulled on his night shirt. “Since… ever. I don’t think I’ve ever been this eager to go to sleep.”

“At least you’re going willingly.” Morgana trotted past Akira and Yusuke to leap onto the bed and claim the pillow closest to the wall. “Maybe for once you won’t look like a total mess when you wake up.”

“Well I’m certain his hair will still be in disarray.” Yusuke adjusted his sleep pants as he moved towards Akira’s bed. “But I agree, I think that everyone will have a good night’s sleep tonight.”

“I’ve been waiting for it.” Akira sighed as he moved to the bed. Yusuke slipped in after he pulled back the covers so Akira followed. The window was open and his fan was on. All for Yusuke’s sake. The warmth of the body next to his own. The bed was roomy and soft but Akira was in heaven. “I missed this.”

“So did I.” Yusuke said softly. His hand moved for his so Akira shifted so he was wrapping himself around his boyfriend. Face to face they held each other watching each other’s eyes in the dimness. Just like they used to do. “There’s so much to do. So much to say.” Yusuke said softly. “But it fades away when I get to hold you like this.”

“It’s so quiet here. Still sort of shitty to borrow Ryuji’s language.” Akira said softly. “I want to be alone but I know I can’t survive like that. Those teachers, the coach. I’m mad Yusuke. I’m so upset because I can see they still don’t understand. But it will make my return easier.”

“It doesn’t change the fact that they hurt you.” Yusuke cupped his face and gently stroked his cheek with his thumb. “Just because you see this as a means to an ends. Just like the cops from the trap. That does not change that they hurt you. Even if they think nothing on it. They still hurt you Akira.”

“I try not to study it.” Akira leaned into Yusuke’s touch. “But it hurt then. It hurts now. It might affect my jumping. I was planning to soak myself in it but I can’t forget.” He closed his eyes. “I just want to think about you. I just want to think about us because winning doesn’t matter anymore.”

“You know what you want to do correct?” Yusuke pressed his forehead against his and Akira smiled. He cupped Yusuke’s cheek with his hand before he relaxed. Then he gently shifted them so he could brush a kiss across Yusuke’s lips.

“I do.” He said softly. “Business school, fast track and then early retirement.” He smiled. “And then a nice big café.” He sighed. “If I win more awards that would make a nice nest egg. I know the place I want us to have. A big apartment with a studio. The café would be a street or two away.” He murmured. “Maybe it is childish to people but I don’t want to be too far from you any longer.”

“An apartment with a studio, a café nearby that I can come over and see you whenever I want.” Yusuke whispered. “If you go to Nationals under them it wouldn’t be for long but make sure it is what you want to do.”

“I want to be with you.” Akira kissed him softly until Yusuke kissed him back. Pressed him back into his pillows with a strength that Akira had forgotten about.

“I’m still here.” Was the irritated grumble behind Yusuke. They leapt apart and up to see Morgana had curled up and was glaring at them. “Seriously? I thought we were going to sleep.”

“Tomorrow’s an off day.” Akira smiled. “We can talk more then.” He found himself yawning before he laughed. “There’s someplace I want to take Yusuke.” An old spot he used to hide away and sleep. It was perfect for them to relax together at and talk about everything they could not speak about over the phone.

“Sleep.” Morgana muttered before he yelped. Yusuke had scooped Morgana up only to deposit him on the pillow between himself and Akira. “What gives?”

“Nothing.” Yusuke said as he settled down. His eyes met Akira’s as he stretched out facing him. Akira settled down too and reached out to hold Yusuke’s hand under the sheet. “I was just missing something.” Akira knew exactly what he meant.

“Me too.” Akira whispered as he snuggled closer. After some thought he moved Morgana to Morgana’s protesting. He moved him to the space between their chests so that he could get his face as close to Yusuke’s as possible. This was what he had been needing, what he had been missing. He loved Yusuke and he had missed his boyfriend so much. “I love you Yusuke.” He squeezed his hand and Yusuke’s squeezed back right away. Sleep came for him right after that and Akira did not fight it. It was the first time for a long time that he had been able to fall asleep quickly and peacefully.


End file.
